22 June 2025

Sometimes our disappointment is transformed when we see what has happened in a wider context or when we are humble enough to acknowledge  the unreality of our expectations. But there are times when our disappointment isn’t so easily explained and our feelings aren’t so readily healed.

On these occasions, we are inclined to trap ourselves in the past by struggling to understand why our expectations weren’t fulfilled. The more we think about what might have happened, the worse we begin to feel and the greater our disappointment.

In these situations, we must look out for God’s messengers and listen to the whisperings of his Holy Spirit. He will help us to detach ourselves from our disappointing past by giving us something to live for in the future.

I remember once being disappointed and unable to understand why my expectations weren’t fulfilled. On that occasion, I was becoming trapped in the past. During this time, I read a little book by Rabbi Kushner whose son died from a degenerative disease when he was only fifteen years old.

In the book, the Rabbi honestly admits that there was no meaning to be found in the tragic death of his son. But the important question to ask isn’t, ‘Why did this happen?’ but rather, ‘What can I do now that it has happened?’

For me that was a liberating experience. Sometimes we have to accept that there is no answer to relieve our disappointment but in letting go of the past, we will find relief in the future by finding out what God wants us to do today!