14 August 2025

Do we try to protect our young people too much? Self-esteem is very important but so is resilience. The two are related. If we feel good about ourselves, we are more likely to be resilient to the things which threaten to undermine us. There is a danger of emphasising the one over the other.

The development of self-esteem is crucial especially in Scotland where people suffer from a lack of it. But if the development of self-esteem is won at the cost of protecting young people from negative experiences and not equipping them with strategies to cope, what’s the benefit?

Equally well, if we expect young people to bounce back too soon after every failure and disappointment, we may be in danger of becoming unsympathetic and dispassionate. This is a return to the bad old days when people were inclined to say, ‘Tough luck!’ or ‘That’s life!’ or ‘Make the most of it!’

Both qualities are important – self-esteem and resilience. Both can be distorted. Too much emphasis on how we feel about ourselves will make us self-preoccupied. Too much emphasis on being strong will make us unsympathetic. What should we do? What about a return to the gospel.

Firstly, remember the great cloud of witnesses. You are not alone.  Negative experiences isolate us. We immediately think that we are the only ones to whom this has happened.  But there’s nothing new under the sun. The cloud of witnesses bears eloquent witness to this!

Secondly, ‘lay aside every weight and the sin that clings so closely’. Don’t look back, look forward! There are things in the past which need resolved. Look to Jesus and the Father’s love and let ‘the sin that clings so closely’ go!

Thirdly, ‘run with perseverance the race that is set before us’. Don’t give up – keep faith with yourself, the great cloud of witnesses, God! Perseverance enables us to make something worthwhile out of the worst possible circumstances. It brings to fruition the unexpected solution to our problem.